There's no witchcraft in blood.
It's shaped like nothing,
like practicality, a modified sphere.
Experience is unpainterly.
The beauty of it always lost
to the body that lost the blood.
At best, taboo
or disgust;
at worst, bare fact.
for read write poem
3WW, The Final Chapter (and Week No. 538)
6 years ago
'Experience is unpainterly.' - excellent line is a pretty good poem. Some nice imagery here and thought-provoking. For me it's not quite there yet and I think the weakness is the opening stanza but the remaining two aren't quite right on their own. But they're close.
ReplyDeleteyeah, i wasn't too satisfied with it either.
ReplyDeletePowerful words in relation. The sun, the moon, the cricket hiding inside the geraniums - I see, yet how much all understand these things in near or distance approach. I like this poem even if I don't so much all understand what I see. Not even necessarily abstract, but just another of many mysteries. Am I the angel's advocate?
ReplyDeleteWhy must we always understand everything? We don't. Not really.
But then, your poem, and wish as you please. I'll like it anyway. Pardon, if you must!
I like the second part, especially "Experience is unpainterly."
ReplyDeleteWhat a great idea for a series of poems! And your language is superb--detached and witty. Nice!
ReplyDeletethis is the line that stands out to me:
ReplyDeleteThe beauty of it always lost
that's a perfect descriptor for blood. it's consumed, used, spilled, etc. your line says a lot.